gosh Scorpio, what a very traumatic thing to happen to you as a little girl. I'm not suprised you were in tears with so much emotion going through you. I hope you find this group a supportive and caring way to help heal some of that pain.
I don't know if you'll find this helpful, its something I do when trying to heal some deep and possibly buried emotions from childhood that I know are still effecting me now, and that somehow blocking them creates more ongoing problems than the fear of me going within and facing them. I often do some healing on myself by connecting with the little girl within me, i just do some meditation or relaxation to get comfortable. Then i kind of go inside myself, the child in me doesn't live in my head or mind, more in my heart or solar plexus or other emotional centres. So i kind of imagine a beautiful safe place and just ask my inner child to come along and talk to me. Listen to what she says without judgment, let her shout, cry or ignore me. Very interesting what i get sometimes. The important thing is to just allow the child to express whatever they want, not to advise but always be very loving and thank the child for what they have shared. Its a way to express emotion and maybe move some of it, with your own adult self being your own healer. I know you are a spiritual person Scorpio so this bit might appeal to you, I also ask my guardian angel or spirit guide, or whatever is for you your highest self, to come with me to this special place to help with the healing. It's important to let you inner child know how beautiful and wonderful they are, give them all they need and let them know you'll be back before you go. Amazing how children, so sensitive so receptive, can carry alot of feelings of guilt and lack of self worth. And i find doing this helps to heal some of that. May sound crazy, but i've experienced some amazing shifts this way. And I think it's a beautiful way to love yourself and to love and honour the child who may have experienced alot of pain they never got to express. Please forgive me if this is unwanted suggestion or am barking up the wrong tree!
Wonderful that this came up for you at the meeting, you were saying a few weeks ago how you weren't sure if anything would come through for you
Anyway, sending loads of hugs to you and you inner child from me and mine lol!


-- Edited by lula at 14:26, 2008-04-10

wow. That must've been very powerful Scorpio! I love what you said about our loved ones who have passed over comforting us. I often feel my Nan, who always used to say she was coming back, much to my dad's horror (he really does not like to think about things beyond the seen world). I feel this warmth down one side and I know it's her, as if she is sitting on my bed. And I always find it very very moving and comforting and feel all this love around me.

I had to give up the ghostbusting group for a while Lula, as our Leader for our London and Essex team has had to have a break for a couple of months or so for personal reasons, so if we wanted to we could have joined Surrey and Middlesex group for a while, but I have decided to give it a break as well, and concentrate on my spiritualist evenings, this week I'm going to join the awareness circle and see if I can bring out the abilities that I have been told I have, see what happens

Do you know Lula, you was right, once I had been there last night, I had the best sleep for ages It did seem as though a massive weight had been shifted from my shoulders, funny though, the medium did say, that on a certain day around 11am, I will feel a sudden rush of energy, so maybe it's today,

I would love to know as well what kind of aftershave he wears , it is really peculiar how when you dream, something as trivial as a smell, can be so overpowering within your dream, it's as though it's the main factor of the dream, I wonder if our sense of smell is enhanced when we sleep? with the main senses of touch/smell/taste etc it's funny how one of the senses  seem to stand out so clearly. and why we remember that so vividly when we wake up!

The funny thing that got me thinking is what the female medium said to me!
She said the person whom i admire within a group, is that I have the ability to be just as good as them God knows what she was on about, maybe she was talking about the paranormal group I belong to, although I haven't been for ages, as our London team has had to suspend for a while due to the leader having personal problems, but I don't admire anyone there...lol, just all weird to me at the moment, once I focus, it should become clear.

Thanks Lula, i just got it from the City of Angels DVD, took a snapshot of him

Now for the big update of tonight

I was called tonight, by the main medium, he does tarot cards and clairvoyance, he told me I have a huge black cloud over me, that is blocking everything, My spirit guide is worried, he said they don't want to lose their instrument, meaning me, whatever that means, I have to get rid of this cloud, bad vibes really, perhaps this is why is have been feeling out of sorts for the past couple of weeks.
Then the female medium spoke to me on my own, she took me to one side and she told me a lady is worried for me, I have a male that is blocking my physic ability, she looked at my palm and told me the 2 stars on my hand is exactly like hers, and that if I can close my eyes and search for the white light, look for the light to lift the cloud, I could become a very good medium, I have the ability, but whoever this guy is around me is stopping me. I was told I can acheive better things, wonderful things will open up for me, once I learn to control my inner feelings and thoughts, and these dreams I'm having are part of my ability, which I must learn to use to trust in my instinct, go with the hunches I have, don't ignore them, that's what my stars have been telling me these past couple of weeks.
So in other words, I could become a very good physic, with a little help from them, my spirit guides/angels and myself, could open up a whole new dimension


As for my dream of Nicky, well it was weird, nothing sexual or naughty thoughts
I dreamnt that I was  in my eldest daughters bedroom, pottering around as usual, maybe cleaning her room, and I heard the doorbell go.
Now i had the TV on and I could hear voices downstairs, I couldnt make out who they were, so I chose to carry on with what I was doing!
All of a sudden, my daughter's bedroom door opens, and in walks Nic
I can even remember this chunky white jumper, something like Aaron knit, and he was wearing some nice jewellery as well, and he had this sort of messy look about him, his hair all out of place, but attractive with it, rugged look, but it was his aftershave, he was standing next to me, and all I could smell was this beautiful smell of aftershave, It was so vivid, it smelt like aqua marine, cool water aftershave, we must have been chatting for about 5 mins, when someone said that his men were coming to collect him in 3 mins with the car, that was that, the end of my dream, worse luck
How weird was that dream, I could not make any sense of it at all, apart from the beautiful smell of aftershave , as though it was in my room as I was sleeping, maybe a spirit came to visit me during my sleep wearing that aftershave...LMAO

hey perhaps we need more sunlight! You always seem to have a good level of awareness about yourself Scorpio. But sometimes its good to get the guidance as well isn't it? So i hope something crops up for you tonight!
Your dreams sound intriguing..care to share?

I've never been to a spiritualist church, though I have had a few clairvoyant readings.
I'm so sorry to hear how you've been feeling the past coppola weeks Scorpio. I've been very up and down too, but I have been having some amazing insights as well. Sometimes things seem to speed up, get chaotic or hit a brick wall, but sometimes that's the turning point before things get better. A very wise spiritual friend once said to me that making a sumptuous cake involves breaking eggs and making a right old mess mixing it all up in a bowl and cooking it at a ridiculous temperature... Before you get a result. Also, that the coldest hour is the hour before dawn, but the sunrise always comes .
I hope you get the answers you are looking for Scorpio, but if you don't, remember to trust you own intuition, and that you always have the power inside of you to steer the course you are on! loving light right at ya!